Saturday, January 10, 2015

Happy Christmas, Shrek!

As a naturally boring person, my idea of a perfect vacation is sitting on the couch and watching Jeopardy with my family. My dad's idea of a perfect vacation is the beach-- any beach (but extra points if there's a Costco nearby.) Despite my many attempts to convince everyone how fun it would be to stay home and eat Doritos together, my family decided to go nontraditional this year and spend a few days celebrating the birth of our Savior in the Dominican Republic. 

Our original flight was canceled, so we spent the better part of Day 1 hanging out in various airports.

Homeless, or performer in a live nativity?
If I told you the rest of us were traveling in sheep costumes, would that change your answer?

I'll spare you the photos of me in a bathing suit, but take my word that there was a good time had by all. As sisters, we developed a synchronized swimming routine in the midst of an afternoon rainstorm. I like to think the entire resort enjoyed watching this 8 times in a row, as we were the only people in the pool. We drooled over a darling British family whose two little girls went swimming in both ruffly bathing suits and long sleeved pajamas. It made me want to quit school and be a nanny.

I seriously underpacked and had to wear the same clothes all week, but what else is new? 

We revealed our true colors as poor backcountry hicks when we had no idea how to eat a fancy seven-course Christmas Eve dinner. The waiter brought out fancy plates of sea bass and we just begged him for more rolls. When he served bowls containing a small cracker and a tiny quail leg, we gleefully picked them up with our fingers and licked the bones clean, grateful for something that wasn't seafood. He returned four minutes later, aghast that we had all eaten the nibble of quail-cracker before he could pour scallop cream into the bowls. Yes, this was supposed to be a soup course and instead we ate the toppings right out of the bowl with our hands. By this point, we were crying from laughter-- but also secretly congratulating ourselves for dodging a bullet with that scallop cream. For the rest of the meal, a whole team of waiters surrounded the table to serve our food, making sure we couldn't screw it up by eating too fast. By the end, we were so full we said we wanted to leave before the dessert round. Needless to say, I don't think we impressed as Americans.

Unwritten rule of vacations: There is nothing more magical than discovering an English television channel in a foreign country-- it automatically makes whatever is on at least 4x better than it would be at home. So it makes sense that my favorite part of the whole trip was watching Shrek Forever After in the hotel one night with Tori and Megan. We quoted the three little German pigs for the rest of the week; it was not annoying at all.

Back home. This part was not long enough.
Also, Franklin the Dog-- sitting on his favorite blanket and looking especially dapper after getting a bath.

Elder Simpson New Year's Day Skype. ONLY 6 MORE MONTHS!!!

New Basement Couch-- brushing up on Shreks 1 and 2, obviously.
Lindsay and Ryan got creative with stadium seating for (RIP) Old Denim Couch.

P.S. You can assume, based on this post, that I did indeed survive finals season. Thank you for your love and support!
I won't know how I scored until the end of January, at which point you should probably check back here for a post entitled In the Depths of Despair. 

Until then, I will likely continue muddling through school and playing House with my roommates. ("Playing House" sounds domestic-- but it's what we call spending hours watching old seasons of House and seeing if you can guess from the beginning what's wrong with the patient/ how the episode will play out. So far it's been a large ego boost.)

As Rachel Lynde would say, the sun will go on rising and setting whether I fail in Civil Procedure or not. At least over the break I found a shade of red lip color that makes me feel like not a clown. Not to downplay serving a mission or law school or anything, but I have a pretty small mouth so this well may be my greatest accomplishment of 2014.
On to a new year!

1 comment:

  1. I am literally in love with this entry. And you. And you in red lipstick. And everything about this. Mainly the pics of the homeless nativity. hahah dying.