Awesome Things That Have Happened Lately

1.) So, first, there's the obvious.

You know that annoying newly engaged girl who doesn't just act like she's the first person to ever fall in love, but like she freakin' invented the institution of marriage??  Yes, that is me. I don't know anyone who has served in San Fernando before, so it's basically like I am opening mainland China. It's still so fresh. I will listen eagerly to your unsolicited mission advice for at least two hours.

2.) I have the best major ever. Not only are they, by definition, the most attractive people on campus– they are also the absolute nicest. This just gave me the warm fuzzies. LUV U SO MUCH, BROADCAST BABIEZZ!! I'll post more on you latah.

2.) Harassed my friend Audrey into singing an open mic night with me so I could not fail my guitar class. The entire Cullen family came out to support, which made us feel oh-so-loved. 

 

All my favorite vampires.

3.) My first 100 at the testing center. Perfect Score! it told me. chh. About time– I've waited four and a half years to read those words. THANKS, YOGA FINAL! You really came through for me there. [In hindsight, I don't know why I didn't take a picture; my posterity will never believe me.]

4.) The last Friday of classes, my roommates and I all stayed in and had a baby. I fed her milk and sang her Skinny Love– AKA the only song ever written with the word "suckle" in it. She waited to spit up until literally the second I handed her off to Shannon. atta girl, Lydia.  

5.) You know the running store by Macy's? 26.2? Yeah, not only do they give student discounts, they give them based on your GPA. Not just a promo deal, all the time. I got new running shoes [finally] for 25% off. You can't beat that, people. HOLLA for local business!!

6.) Temple Square. One of these photos is not like the others. See if you can spot the difference:

(a) pretty.

(b) pretty.

(c) pretty.

Oh wait, why is that demon voodoo doll hanging out on the top of the nativity? Were we out of stars, or what?!?

7.) USGA testimony meeting. No one excels like these guys at living the gospel while keepin it real. Many wonderful spiritual things were shared. But here was my favorite line of the night:

"I love you guys even more than Lana Del Ray." 

8.) That last post I wrote about the mission call finally surpassed in readership the post I wrote this summer about the Bachelorette. Seriously, what a relief that we all have our priorities in order. I feel like there's something wrong with me when everybody likes my dumb jokey posts more than [all two of] my touchy-feely ones.

But don't get me wrong...

The Ten Commandments of Running

from "The Gospel According to Lauren."

1. Thou shalt not do what givest thou grief. Dost thou even LIKE to run in the first place? If every step inviteth the thought, "I hate my life," then thou shalt stop immediately and turn thy face towards Zumba instead.

2. Thou shalt invest in a good pair of running shoes. Be not deceived by Asics, for just because they are popular does not mean they are not also equivalent to strapping bricks to thy feet. (Also, thou shalt invest in a good sports bra if that's an issue.)

3. Honor thy body, that thy days may be long upon the land. Harken not to strict training schedules, goeth not out when thou art sick or sore, and save race training for spring- for behold, long runs bringeth no joy to the freezing.

4. Thou shalt resist the urge to buy new clothing every time thou encountereth a seller of sporting goods. But also... thou shalt not judge thy friends who may or may not own 5 pairs of black stretchy pants. Because these things happen.

5. Thou shalt not journey alone on sketchy paths. Especially the Provo River Trail: this thou shalt not travel without an help-meet. For though we do not subscribe to victim-blaming, let us also recognize that some areas are safer than others.

6. Thou shalt not depart from thy house in the late hours of night, for lo! Creepers seek to carry thee away into strange vans. Also, thou deservest to get thy beauty sleep.

7. Forsake thine angsty music. Thou shalt listen to only that which uplifts and bringeth thee happiness, for running is not the sport of haters. Unless thou art a troubled 16-year-old boy, there is no excuse for Linkin Park to have any place on thine iPod.

8. Thou shalt not cut carbs. From the depths of experience, let me repeat: Thou shalt not diet. Instead, thou shalt eat MORE carbohydrates than thy non-running friends and rejoice in thy increasing metabolism. Also, thou shalt drink water like unto a camel.

9. Observe the Sabbath Day to keep it Holy, for this is a day of rest and not of burning cals.

10. Thou shalt not seek attention in hot pink shortie shorts but clad thyself with the inner confidence of T-shirt androgyny. Nor shalt thou respond to car-honkers, whistlers, or shouters of "Hey girl."

Yea, when the world shall say to thee

"Girl, look at that body,"

thou shalt reply,

"My body is a temple- a tabernacle for mine eternal soul which is far greater than my physical appearance."

But lo, if at the time thou art not out in the glories of nature but in the gym with the bros lifting weights with the sinewy strength of thy chicken arms- then thou mayest proudly toss thy head and say,

"I work out."

The Feeling of Being in Love

Today I really did want to go run outside in the warm January air.
Not hard- just feel the gentle rhythmic mindlessness of my feet plodding one after the other. Music just loud enough to obliterate the sound of my labored breathing. Always on shuffle, because I'm never really in a rush... And because I'm a bit of a fatalist.

But instead of passing, the rain turned into a soft and steady snowfall.
At this point, there was only one thing to do. Crack open the window, turn off everything but our twinkle lights, and curl up on the couch with my favorite down blanket and some e.e. cummings.

somewhere i have never travelled,gladly beyond
any experience,your eyes have their silence:

in your most frail gesture are things which enclose me,
or which i cannot touch because they are too near

your slightest look easily will unclose me
though i have closed myself as fingers,
you open always petal by petal myself as Spring opens
(touching skilfully,mysteriously)her first rose

or if your wish be to close me, i and
my life will shut very beautifully ,suddenly,
as when the heart of this flower imagines
the snow carefully everywhere descending;

nothing which we are to perceive in this world equals
the power of your intense fragility:whose texture
compels me with the color of its countries,
rendering death and forever with each breathing

(i do not know what it is about you that closes
and opens;only something in me understands
the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses)
nobody,not even the rain,has such small hands

I first discovered this poem when I was a junior in high school, reading ahead in my English textbook.
I know that not everyone has a literary first love. But I did.
(Did you?)

The best thing about poetry is that you never really have to move on.